Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Such Sadness

Since February 2011, I have watched (from a distance) my brother deteriorate from multiple cancers and today he left this world for another one.  My other brother is also deteriorating from a spinal injury and will soon join his brother.  I am to be the oldest of the children after 48 years of being third from the top and I am so sad.  For my first 5 years, my 2 brothers raised me, protected me and provided for me and my youngest sister.  They were my link to memories of my mother who walked away in my fifth year and never returned.  For the next 6 years they tormented and harassed me, but always with the jokes.  We would sit around the kitchen table, tell jokes & one liners and laugh until we cried.  My Dad was the ringleader of this band of merry men.   When I was 11, my brothers left for the Army and we rarely saw each other but when we did, we would laugh like maniacs as if we were never parted. 

The party has moved to heaven now and the 3 boys (Dad included) are probably going to torment & harass me from a far until I join them.  I can picture you Red leaning down from the top bunk and pretending to be the windshield wipers on my glasses while I cry.  Miss you bro.

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